Aaron Summers

3 Questions You Should Always Ask

In Family, Leadership on January 14, 2015 at 8:36 am

redeeming

Cameron walked home as he did every day, entered the house, and turned on the Xbox One he got for his birthday.  That was a great day!  His friends were all treated to a day at the water park.  Now, the cold of the winter makes it seem like such a long time ago.  Sara, his mom, went back to work ever since the divorce.  Now he comes home to an empty house, except for his sister Kayla who drives him crazy.  He eats a snack while taking out the enemy in the newest Call of Duty.  His Mom was really feeling bad the other day since she had to work another double at the hospital.  He played it just right and now it’s on!

One more day gone.

Tonight was supposed to be ” family supper”, which is something new they were going to try.  Of course, that was 15 minutes ago.  The door flies open and she rushes in with take-out…again!  She is stressed and throws the food on the table and says she needed a bath and candles.  They could feed themselves.  Kayla is sexting. Cameron is wasted.

One more day gone.

How many days do we have?  Only God really knows the exact answer.  The point is that we believe there will always be another day.  Never once have I heard someone say they wish they had spent less time.  My workaholic tendencies have come into controversy as I look at my son, nearly eye to eye, and think where has the time gone?  Wasn’t he just born?  Didn’t he just start school?  13 years down and 6 to go before he is off to college.

One more day gone.

For years, I have attempted to develop my listening skills.  A speaker by nature and a fixer by gender, listening is not always the easiest thing.  Thus, I have tried to ask questions.  Here are 3 questions you should always ask.  Questions open people up.  Questions allow you to hear their heart.  Questions provide opportunities.

1.  What did you love about today?  Ken Blanchard in The One Minute Manager teaches to start with a positive.  Asking someone what they loved about today gets you off to a good start.  There is always something to love about each day, right?  Even if it seems like a negative statement, take what you can get!  Help them see the good in each day; to count their blessings; to consider it all joy when we face trials.  What was good about today?

2.  What did you learn today? With kids this is easy.  Once everyone gets home you can ask this easily.  Hopefully they will give you an educational answer.  As my kids age, I am finding that I get social answers as often as anything!  Susie did this.  Kiah said that.  You will never guess was Joshua did today.  Whichever answer you receive, be glad to receive one.

3.  What needs to be left behind?  God is the great forgiver…and forgetter.  Paul reminds us to press forward, look ahead, and leave behind the past.  Helping our family and friends identify what has hurt, harmed, or offended helps them in this process.  Holding on to grudges does not hurt the other person, it hurts you.

With each tick on the clock, we draw closer to one more day gone.  Let us not waste the time we have with those we love or lead.  Take the time you don’t think you have and ask a few questions.

Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.  Ephesians 5:16

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